Top Of My Head

Thoughts on everything from Politics to Video Games

Tag: Gay Marriage (page 2 of 2)

Wedding Bells for Everyone

Have you ever gone to a wedding and heard someone whisper, “I give it six months”?

Have you ever been the one doing the whispering? Be honest now.

Well, I’ll be honest, I have.

I have known couples where I didn’t give them six minutes who are still together twenty years later. And, I’ve seen couples whom I thought were perfect for each other who split up.  My mother always taught me that you don’t know what goes on in someone else’s relationship. She isn’t often right, but she is in this case.

Which brings me to the topic at hand – gay marriage. How can someone actually think that not allowing marriage for gay people is protecting straight marriage? How can anyone in this modern age propose to decide who should marry and who should not?

Isn’t that the samething as sitting in a church and passing judgment on your fellow human being’s love? And, in passing this judgement, you don’t even know the couple!

Why do Boehner, Palin and the rest of the right feel the need to “protect marriage”? Why isn’t he out to protect civil rights?

How can we decide that one couple deserves protections and special tax breaks while another couple doesn’t? I don’t think I would want that much power over another person – to determine the love of their life. It is a decision that should be left up to the individual couple.

You really want to protect marriage – how about mandatory pre-marital counseling and making it harder to get a divorce. That might “protect” marriage.

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Obama’s DOMA Decision

Man, I’m torn.

On one hand, I’m thrilled that DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act) is probably going down.  On the other hand, I’m not happy about the way it is going to happen.

Here’s the thing, Obama is just plain wrong.  Yes, DOMA is unconstitutional.  Yes, DOMA makes some citizens of the United States unequal to other citizens.  Yes, I want to see DOMA gone.

However; there is a larger and more important issue at stake here.

If the Department of Justice doesn’t defend attacks on our laws in court, then no law is sound.  As much as I like Obama, this is a serious oversight on his part.  I would think that someone who specialized in Constitutional law would’ve had a little more sight into the big picture.  Calling on the Justice Department to not defend DOMA is wrong.  It sends the wrong message on our Nation’s laws.  It will allow the next President to decide that he doesn’t like a law and tell the DOJ to not do their job to defend our Nation’s laws.

I’ve heard talk among gay people that Obama hasn’t done enough for us.  But, seriously, did anyone really cast their vote for Obama thinking that him being President would mean gays and lesbians would be allowed to legally marry?  I know I didn’t.

I, also, believe that at this moment in time, we have more pressing matters.  Our economy – though it is improving – needs more hand holding.  We need to put the money taken from Social Security and put it back in.  We need to improve our education.  Gay marriage is a little low on the list.

I know President Obama is a politician and politicians do things to gain political power or to make their base happy (Can anyone say Scott Walker and Koch Industries?), but I a truly disappointed in Obama.  I expected more from him than a cold bone that will harm our legal system for years to come.  I wanted the DOJ to defend DOMA to their best of their abilities and then lose because the law is morally bankrupt and unconstitutional.  I wanted a ruling that would stick for years to come, not a band aid.

Obama should’ve come up with a better way to do this.

NOM at it again!

MG from NOM is propagandizing again in an upcoming OPB (Oregon Public Broadcasting) program. This link goes to an article about it before the show and asks “what does marriage mean to you” It’s asking for input in the comments section.

http://www.opb.org/thinkoutloud/shows/meaning-marriage/

Let’s tell NOM that marriage is for everyone and not the chosen few, like they believe.

Credit to Jennifer White.  I saw this on her facebook page!

Killing Marriage

There’s an article on MSNBC that quotes a new survey about marriage.  According to the article, 4 in 10 people believe that marriage is becoming obsolete.  By my calculations, that works out to 40% of the people out there.

Ironic, isn’t it?

At a time when gay people are screaming for our rights to be married, 40% of straight people aren’t feeling the need to get married.  All of those anti-gay marriage groups keep proclaiming that you have to stop gay marriage in order to protect marriage.  I think they need to change their tune and their focus.

Instead of picking on the people who want to marry, they should start taking a good look at those people who don’t want or don’t feel the need to get married.  Maybe, they should hold Pro-marriage rallies for straight people and let them know the advantages of marriage.

And, there are plenty of advantages to be married, including inheritance rights, health care decision making and tax advantages.  Married couples – when the marriage works – offer a  stable environment for their families and friends.  Saving money on your taxes is a good thing, as well, so why wouldn’t straight people want to get married?

It makes no sense at all.

What does make sense is that the decline of the idea of marriage as an institution to which one would want to strive cannot be blamed on us gay people.

To straights every where:  Start working to save your marriages!

Taxes and More Taxes

The election is over and now it is time for the lame duck Congress to get back to work. But, even though it won’t do any good, I wanted to bring up taxes.

Everyone thinks – Warren Buffett the exception – that they pay too much in taxes. Because I have an extra taxable amount added to my normal salary this year, Cheryl and I have been paying a lot of attention to just how much we’ll owe in taxes come April 15th. By my calculations, between the two of us, we’ll owe a grand amount of $12,126, a tax rate of 13.40%. For a fun time, I thought, “Hey, what if we could file our federal income taxes jointly?” So, I used the IRS Withholding Calculator and did just that. If we were married, our tax amount would be $11,281, a tax rate. That is a tax rate of 12.47% and a total of $845 less. It makes me mad every time I think about it.

What is it that Cheryl and I receive from the federal government that is worth the extra $845? Do we have extra rights? Extra protections? Will the government take care of us when we’re old and gray in a better manner than a straight, married couple?

No, no and – I know you’re shocked – no.

We receive NOTHING for the extra dollars removed from our paychecks every single year. And, if Paul Ryan gets his way, it will only get worse. (Check out Paul Ryan’s Roadmap for America and you’ll see his plan for two tax tiers.)

By denying gay couples the legal right to marry at the Federal level, the nation is over-taxing approximately 770,000 couples in this country.  Let’s make a big assumption, because I don’t have actual figures on incomes, that our over-taxed amount is what every other gay couple pays more than straight couples.  That works out to an extra $650,650,000 in the nation’s tax coffers.

Do we get a thanks for that?

No, we don’t.

Maybe, that’s the real reason why the right-wing doesn’t want us to get married.  That’s a lot of dough!

As a gay person, I purpose that in the next election, we come together to fight for our marriage rights.  We fight for equality.  We’re paying a lot of money to be considered second class citizens.

Who’s with me?

Below is a video I made last August.

Anti-gay People full of crap…

I’m reading an article on the gay marriage ruling in California and this absolute jerk states the following:  “It’s a really sad day for Californians, for families, for our future and for voters that a federal judge has trampled on the civil rights of voters,” said Luke Otterstad, 24, of Sacramento.

Really?  A Federal Judge has trampled on YOUR freaking civil rights?  Hey, moron, how about how sad it was in this country when the jerks in California voted to trample on the rights of tax paying, American Citizens by stopping gay marriages?

What about the trampling on my rights when Wisconsin voted for the anti-gay amendment to my STATE’S constituion?  Did you ever stop to think about the rights of others?

No, you don’t.  You and the others like you are mindless jerks who don’t give a rat’s ass about the freedoms granted to ALL citizens in the United States of America?

And, if you think I’m being too harsh – kiss my lily white ass.  I don’t plan on being nice to these people anymore.  These are the kinds of people who raise children that grow up to gather in a group and attack a lone gay man or lesbian.  These are the kinds of people who think they have a RIGHT to tell other people how to live their lives.  These are kinds of people who spit every single day on our Constitution and then have the nerve to say I don’t love America.

The Constitution and Gay Marriage

I don’t understand how anyone can claim that gay marriage is against the Constitution.  I really do not understand.  The 14th Amendment clearly states: “No State shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any State deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.” (emphasis mine)

Whether you like gay people or not.  Whether you agree with gay marriage or not.  The 14th Amendment clearly states that we are to all be treated equally.  The ability to marry in this country isn’t a right, it is a privilege.  Being able to file taxes together, make medical decisions for each other, inherit from each other and make legal decisions for each other is a privilege.  If all couples are not treated equally under the law, then there shouldn’t be legal marriages.  Period.

What makes my brother, Brian’s, marriage to Tara better than my marriage to Cheryl?  Why should they be allowed to file taxes together?  Or, inherit from each other?

Case in point – and something I’ve discussed with my brother – if one of my siblings proceeds our parents in death (God forbid), their heirs (i.e., wife and children) inherit a third of my parents’ estate.  However; if I proceed my parents in death (again, God forbid), Cheryl gets nothing.  Because the state refuses to acknowledge our relationship legally and morally, Cheryl is not considered an heir of my parents.

Is that fair?  Is it just?  Is it right?

No, no and no.

Do my parents consider Cheryl less of a daughter-in-law than Robyn and Tara?

Again, no.

But, legally, there’s nothing to protect her.  Granted, my parents could make a provision in their will, my brothers could split my parents’ estate with her or whatever.  That really is beside the point.  They shouldn’t have to do anything.  She should be my legal heir via a marriage license – just as Robyn and Tara are Scott and Brian’s legal heirs.

Anything less is unconstitutional.

Woman finds out about Husband’s double life

On the day after a Federal judge struck down California’s Prop 8 (which bans gay marriage), news comes out about a wife discovering that her husband had married another woman.  I wonder if that will lead to divorce or if the right wing, anti-gay groups will still claim that gay marriage is bad for straight marriages?

H.R.1024 – Uniting American Families Act of 2009

H.R. 1024 – Uniting American Families Act of 2009 – is languishing in the House.  The poor bill is just sitting there in the Subcommittee on Immigration, Citizenship, Refugees, Border Security, and International Law.


We need to work together, fellow citizens, to get it out.


Here’s the deal: There are literally thousands of American citizens who are separated from their life partners because they can’t sponsor them to become American citizens or even to receive their green cards.  Does that even make sense?  A company can obtain a green card for someone to have a “highly skilled” job that takes the job away from a U.S. citizen, but life long partners cannot keep their families together.  It is a disgrace that we allow this to happen.


So, here’s what I want you to do.  I want you to send a letter to Congressperson and ask them to address this situation.  There’s an organization who is working on grassroot efforts called Change.  They have a letter posted on the site that you can use if you don’t know what to write.  


Let’s all join together and make a difference!

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