Top Of My Head

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Category: Gay (page 1 of 2)

Gay Marriage: The Real Inequality

Last week, the US Supreme Court ruled that DOMA was unconstitutional.  That means that gay people in states that recognize or have gay marriage will have their marriages recognized.  This is good – for them.

For those of us who are gay, in non-legally recognized marriages and living in the wrong states, nothing has changed.  We still do not have the right to inheritance, hospital visitations and joint income tax returns.  It, also, means we don’t have the responsibilities and protections that marriage offers.

There are legal ways around this.  My wife and I have registered as Domestic Partners, so we have some of these rights.  And, prior to Domestic Partnerships being legal in my state, we had signed power of attorneys for health and legal matters.

BUT…

What we can’t do is file a marriage, filing jointly income tax return.  And, this is what burns my butt.

By myself, I will pay $12,260 in Federal Income Taxes in 2013.  My wife (who earns less than I do) will pay $2,978.  Together, that’s $15,238.  (This is based on the IRS Withholding Calculator.)  Using the same calculator, I calculated what we would owe if we could file as a married filing jointly couple and the amount is $13,901.  That’s $1,337 less than what we’re separately paying now.

I don’t think I’m receiving $1,337 in extra Federal Benefits, do you?  What am I getting for this money?  Why is MY marriage not recognize by the Federal government because a bunch of bigots didn’t want gay marriage nine years ago – and they won. (By cheating, the question was worded so that yes meant against gay marriage and no meant for gay marriage.  I can’t tell you the number of my friends who were happy it passed, because they couldn’t figure out the difference.)

In any case, we have a long way to go.

To My Gay Brothers and Sisters: God Loves YOU!

I realize that not all of you are Christian, but hear me out anyway.  I was praying the other day on my way into work.  (I do that.)  And, the following thoughts occurred to me.  God doesn’t make mistakes.  God loves me.  God made me who I am.

For a good portion of my life, I have struggled in my relationship with God and being gay.  Right-wing “Christians” will point to all sorts of passages in the Bible as proof that God hates gays.  Just last week, a right-wing co-worker proclaimed that if I am secure in being gay, it must be because Satan has been answering my prayers.  Satan – not God.

And, they wonder why we hate them.

Actually, I don’t hate my co-worker, I pity her.  And, her comment led to a very interesting discussion with my pastor (yes, I attend church – although, I admit that I miss some Sundays).  And, that conversation led to something I believe that God revealed to me while I was praying.  Ready?  Because I’m serious:

God loves us – every single one of us – and He wants us to be happy. On top of that, He wants us to have a relationship with Him and His Son. And – anyone who interferes with our relationship with God is not working for God and they are not taking orders from God – they are doing Satan’s work.

Think about that. I’ll wait. Read it again, if you must.  I’ll even repeat it – if someone interferes with your relationship with God, they are doing Satan’s work.

See, Satan wants our souls.  He has a deal with God.  He can tempt us and if we give in to him, he gets our soul.  BUT, we have to freely give Satan our soul.  I’ve never done that – have you?  Well, if you have, you can get it back, by asking for forgiveness from God.  But, that’s another topic.

See, Rev Phelps from the Westboro Baptist Church – you know, the “God Hates Fags” guy – He’s working for Satan.  NOM – the National Organization of Marriage people – Satanists.  American Family Associations – HUGE SATAN FOLLOWERS.  And, all these groups have something in common – they are very sad and we should pray for them.  They don’t realize that they are working for Satan.  They have been so overtaken by believing in themselves, by their destructive self-righteousness, that they have scales on their eyes.  These people are the modern day Sadducees and Pharisees – you know, those people who were so against Jesus in the Bible and tried to trick Him. They had an answer for everything.  And, they were wrong.

God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son so that all who believe in Him shall not perish, but have everlasting life. (John 3:16).

Don’t forget that.

I’m not saying that we aren’t sinners.  We are.  Everyone is a sinner.  But, we’re not sinners solely because we’re gay.  Should we try to live a righteous life?  Well, I can’t speak for you, but I try to do so.  Do I succeed?  Not always.

And, now a quote from Spencer Tracy: “Don’t let the bastards get you down.”  If you have a relationship with God, don’t hide it.  Live it, breathe it and pass it on.  If you don’t, don’t hide from Him.  He loves you and He wants a relationship with you.  Don’t run from Him.  And, don’t let the bastards get you down.  Don’t let the right-wing terrorists separate you from the love of God.  Living in His light is better than living in their darkness.

God Bless!

Gay Marriage Rights…

‎”Marriage is a tax shelter and a smart way for a couple to combine assets. Love is the thing that’s sacrosanct. The sooner we understand the difference, the sooner we’ll understand why Kim Kardashian’s wedding was never holy, and why countless gay couples around the United States who love each other despite marriage bans are truly righteous.” – Cord Jefferson

Freedom To Marry

The National Organization for Marriage – NOM – is holding a huge fundraiser to prevent marriage equality in this great country of ours.  If you believe that marriage is between two people who are in love, please consider donating to Freedom to Marry.  I believe that this isn’t a tax deductible donation because they are a political organization, but any little bit you can give will help move our nation into the light of marriage equality.

You know, we all have a gay cousin…Wouldn’t you like to attend his or her legal marriage ceremony?  I know I would.  (But, in my family, I am the gay cousin.)

Taxes and More Taxes

The election is over and now it is time for the lame duck Congress to get back to work. But, even though it won’t do any good, I wanted to bring up taxes.

Everyone thinks – Warren Buffett the exception – that they pay too much in taxes. Because I have an extra taxable amount added to my normal salary this year, Cheryl and I have been paying a lot of attention to just how much we’ll owe in taxes come April 15th. By my calculations, between the two of us, we’ll owe a grand amount of $12,126, a tax rate of 13.40%. For a fun time, I thought, “Hey, what if we could file our federal income taxes jointly?” So, I used the IRS Withholding Calculator and did just that. If we were married, our tax amount would be $11,281, a tax rate. That is a tax rate of 12.47% and a total of $845 less. It makes me mad every time I think about it.

What is it that Cheryl and I receive from the federal government that is worth the extra $845? Do we have extra rights? Extra protections? Will the government take care of us when we’re old and gray in a better manner than a straight, married couple?

No, no and – I know you’re shocked – no.

We receive NOTHING for the extra dollars removed from our paychecks every single year. And, if Paul Ryan gets his way, it will only get worse. (Check out Paul Ryan’s Roadmap for America and you’ll see his plan for two tax tiers.)

By denying gay couples the legal right to marry at the Federal level, the nation is over-taxing approximately 770,000 couples in this country.  Let’s make a big assumption, because I don’t have actual figures on incomes, that our over-taxed amount is what every other gay couple pays more than straight couples.  That works out to an extra $650,650,000 in the nation’s tax coffers.

Do we get a thanks for that?

No, we don’t.

Maybe, that’s the real reason why the right-wing doesn’t want us to get married.  That’s a lot of dough!

As a gay person, I purpose that in the next election, we come together to fight for our marriage rights.  We fight for equality.  We’re paying a lot of money to be considered second class citizens.

Who’s with me?

Below is a video I made last August.

Video Re-Run – We don’t hire straight while males

In case you missed it.

Breaking News: Federal Judge strikes down Prop. 8

Yes, Virginia – there are good judges who rule based on the actual Constitution of the United States and not based on some outdated idea.

Read the story here.

I’m sure the wrong wing will be out in force claiming that this was an activist judge ruling from the bench.  Apparently, these people have never actually read the Constitution.

Women become lesbians because they can’t get men

That is what Elizabeth Hasselbeck said yesterday on the View.  She isn’t alone in suggesting this, as Barbara Walters briefly suggested something similar on the View (You can find it on YouTube about 3 minute in) back on March 27, 2009.  She said, “Maybe it is easier for two women to find a relationship than to find a man.”  The statement was practically ignored by her co-hosts.  But, understandably, she is Barbara Walters, it’s her show and who is going to call her on it.

I will give Barbara a pass on this, as she does come from a different generation and she didn’t say, “Older men are going for younger women, leaving the older women with no one”, which I found completely offensive.  In her defense, she didn’t actually say these late blooming lesbians couldn’t get a man, she just mentioned that the men are looking elsewhere.

Still, I couldn’t help myself and I posted a new video making fun of Elizabeth’s little slip.  You can view it here.

AMERICAblog Gay: The Homosexual Menace!

AMERICAblog Gay: The Homosexual Menace!.

I put this out there as a public service announcement for all straight men.

Living the Straight Life

This week, I read a quick post somewhere that mentioned how gays are always shoving their lifestyles down straights’ throats.  And, I thought about it for a little while and it dawned on me that the writer must not realize how “straight” the world is.
When I mention that I’m married, to someone I’ve just met, they usually ask me about my husband. Most people do a double take when I mention that I have a wife. 
Recently, when I filled out an online form for work, I entered Cheryl as my spouse.  The system filled in her sex as male.  HR had to fix it.  A computer system assumed that I was straight.
We get phone calls asking for one of us that the other will take, when I say Mrs. _______ isn’t here, I’m asked if the caller could speak to Mr. ______.   From insurance forms to phone calls and even those dreaded taxes, as a gay person, I’m constantly reminded that the world is geared for straight people.
This isn’t a complaint, I get it.  There’s more straights than gays.  It’s like being left handed.  I read somewhere that 10% of the population is left handed.  The world is geared for right handed people.
But, no one tells someone who is left handed that they are shoving their lifestyle down a right handed person’s throat.
Gays are 10% of the population, why is it when we want to be treated as full members of American society, we’re shoving our lifestyle down society’s throat?
I don’t have an answer.  I just don’t.  I just live in a straight world.  It’s getting better, but we could improve it.

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